Original article Inc. Magazine.

You already know that giving positive feedback is crucial to keeping your employees engaged and motivated. It helps them get clear about what's working so that they can do more of it. It contributes to their confidence so that they can engage in more self-directed, self-motivated work. Research shows that focusing on employees' strengths helps them learn faster, as well as produce more and better-quality work.

And yet, many managers struggle with giving positive feedback (let alone giving any kind of feedback). What makes this so challenging?

In my nearly two decades as an executive coach and a facilitator who helps leaders get better at giving and receiving feedback, I have found these to be the most common excuses.

"My boss didn't give me positive feedback and I made it this far."

"I don't even know where to start to look for positive feedback to give."

It's that last one that's often the trickiest because I hear it from people who manage both low performers and high performers. These managers share that it's hard to identify positive feedback opportunities when employees aren't meeting performance standards, even though they understand that focusing on strengths can help a lower performer stay committed to learning and growing. In addition, when managing a high performer, leaders share that it's challenging to find new behaviors to recognize and praise, even though that's what "best in class" employees need to feel recognized, stay motivated, and be challenged.

In both cases, your employees are making assumptions when they don't get feedback from you, including "I'm not sure what I'm supposed to keep doing." In both cases, it requires some creative thinking to identify opportunities for positive feedback that will be both informational and inspirational.

Here are three ideas to get you started.

1. Asking for and accepting help.

We have evolved as a species to be prosocial creatures, where offering and accepting help have helped us survive. The more our ancestors helped others, the more they were helped in return, which means there was a greater chance for them to survive and reproduce. 

And yet, starting at around age 7, we begin associating asking for help with increased reputational costs. "If I admit that I don't know something or can't do something on my own," we believe, "others will think I'm stupid or weak." Over time, those thoughts become automatic and ingrained, making it harder for us to ask for and accept help. And yet, not asking for help can lead to costly mistakes down the road.

If you notice your employee asking for and accepting help, then they may be working hard to put their ego aside for the good of the project, team, or organization. If you see this, say something like: "I noticed that you asked Sang for help in dealing with a difficult customer. I appreciate that you took that step to make sure we could satisfy the customer and protect our customer service reputation. That demonstrated your care for the customer and our work."

This is also an opportunity to give positive feedback to team members who offer help to one another, especially if they're not overstepping or neglecting their own responsibilities. 

2. Putting your organization's mission, vision, or core values into action on a regular basis.

For many organizations, the mission, vision, and values live on the company's website and are infrequently reviewed with leaders and teams. Or they get brought into a discussion twice a year during performance reviews. Or they're revisited hastily in a crisis, to make sure everyone's behaving.

But these foundational elements of your company shouldn't be gathering dust. They should serve as the north star for how people are performing on a regular basis. One way to do that is to offer frequent positive feedback when people demonstrate behaviors and outcomes that are real-time representations of what the company stands for.

For example, if your company has a core value around innovation, don't wait for someone on your team to come up with the next brilliant market-ready idea before giving them positive feedback. If your team members figured out how to shuffle their schedules to help a colleague get coverage for a last-minute absence, that's innovation in action. If your colleague was able to improvise successfully in a client meeting when the client threw a curveball, that's innovation in action. And if you have a team member who speaks up to you and says, "I know you like things a certain way, but would you be willing to try a different approach?" give them credit for being innovative, even if you don't go down that path. 

3. Improving on previous feedback.

How many times have you given constructive feedback to a colleague and then hoped you wouldn't have to bring it up again? That's a missed opportunity to give positive feedback. When someone takes your feedback and then makes an improvement as a result, you should notice it and positively reinforce it.

For example, if you suggested that your colleague ask more strategic questions in meetings rather than getting mired in tactics, you should actively be looking for evidence to confirm that this is happening. First, seeking confirmation that they're taking your feedback seriously is one way for you to dismantle any confirmation bias that they're not doing so. Second, it's your opportunity to observe a behavior change in the moment, positively reinforce what's working, and give timely tweaks if anything still needs a change. Third, it reminds your colleague that what they're doing has an observable impact. Fourth, it sets the expectation that you're paying attention to them and that your feedback is relevant. And finally, it's your job.

Giving regular positive feedback can feel like just one more thing you have to do as a people leader. But the more meaningful and relevant positive feedback you give, the more you'll help your team members be self-directed and self-motivated. And that's a win for everyone.